The Technophobe in Me

I used to believe IPod’s were the epitome of evil.

I had been brought up on tapes and CD’s and this strange new invention was an abomination. This hatred was borne from watching films like AI and I Robot which portrayed robots taking over the world, I didn’t like that. Nor did I like the fact that they had given them human faces; far too creepy. This irrational fear developed and my hatred for modern technology got so bad that I had retreated further into the past when I was a teen. I listened only to Dean Martin and always insisted on watching John Wayne from my mother’s hefty collection. This is really what my teenage years were really about – pining after an age of chivalry, westerns and of men wearing suits ALL THE TIME. It’s no wonder I found it hard to relate to my fellow peers who were only into the pop princesses; Christina Augilera and Britney.

That is until I got an IPod for Christmas.

Then everything changed and now I have finally embraced the modern age of convenience.

You mean I can listen to all my favourite songs without all the hassle of carrying my collection of cds?!…

WHAT ELSE HAVE I BEEN MISSING OUT ON?!

So yes really my darling IPod pulled my head out of the gramophone and pushed me into the present where I could finally understand my friends’ lingo. Like what on earth this book was that everyone had their face on? Or this Bluetooth that could somehow make us connected. Do I need to go to the dentist for that?

God what an idiot I was.

I tell you one thing the modern age sure does keep modern, doesn’t it? I hardly have time to get the hang of one new gadget before a newer and better version is thrust in my face. I can’t imagine how the elderly are coping because even in my twenties I still am struggling. I mean what’s wrong with turning it down a notch?

I still don’t get the point of twitter…

And another thing that has me baffled is that vintage is in… isn’t it?! Why can’t they build the old fashioned Mini’s and MG’s only with modern engineering? Rather than making new cars that have the same name but don’t really resemble them at all? Those classic cars really have charisma and style so why not emulate that? We have the ability no? Fashion is getting the hint and going back on the tried and true – Thank you so so so much whichever fashion designer it was that brought back…

HIGH WAISTED SHORTS AND JEANS!!!

I really hated the past decade of muffin tops and unnecessary thong exposure with those hipsters. It was a disastrous idea whoever thought of that –it’s your entire fault for all of the disgusting things I have now seen.

I hope one day they do get the hint and make more ‘vintage technology’. Then those who are stuck down nostalgia lane will still have an outlet where they can get what they know and love but with the reassurance of what new technology brings – that it can be fixed or replaced quickly and without too much fuss.

I’m not really sure where I would take my ‘centre piece’ typewriter if it broke… PC world would certainly not be able to help me… so fingers crossed someone will hear my plea because I’m not sure how I will cope if it dies.

My laptop can only console me so much.

You hearing me you scientists out there?

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